Thursday, August 28, 2008

A Series of Tubes

Still silence from the right side of the blogosphere regarding those thugs* in Alaska who voted for Alaska Senator Ted Stevens (R), even though he has been indicted for hiding $250,000 of contributions. One can only assume they're not very smart if this partial text of Steven's attempt to describe the Internet is any indication.

Ten movies streaming across that, that Internet, and what happens to your own personal Internet? I just the other day got... an Internet was sent by my staff at 10 o'clock in the morning on Friday, I got it yesterday [Tuesday]. Why? Because it got tangled up with all these things going on the Internet commercially.

[...] They want to deliver vast amounts of information over the Internet. And again, the Internet is not something that you just dump something on. It's not a big truck. It's a series of tubes. And if you don't understand, those tubes can be filled and if they are filled, when you put your message in, it gets in line and it's going to be delayed by anyone that puts into that tube enormous amounts of material, enormous amounts of material.

Kind of like the thought process that lead Jessica McBride to call those who voted for convicted former alderman Michael McGeee, thugs. She couldn't help herself. Her tubes were full of enormous amounts of racist, right-wing ideology.

(75% of Alaska's 623,000 citizens are white, by the way)


Dad29 said...

Stevens is a complete jackass and likely corrupt, as well.

There. happy?

Other Side said...

I am. Now I feel there is hope for conservatives and it's all because of you, daddio. My outlook has completely changed -- hell, I might even register Republican.

Now if only I could get the DVD player to work. Do you know how to fix DVDs?

grumps said...

As I recall, Frau Bucher was calling them thugs well before there was a conviction. I'm pretty sure that Alaskan Republicans are thugs just for voting for their incumbent racketeer, um, I mean influence peddler of course.

John Foust said...

Actually, I defend Stevens' use of the pipes analogy. I think it's a useful concept for describing several aspects of Internet connections: bandwidth, latency, over-subscription, etc.

He came off as a loon, though. Didn't understand what he was talking about. But some unnamed techie did try to give him a useful analogy.

James Wigderson said...

We did better than that. We're nominating the governor who has been fighting the Republican establishment in Alaska for Vice President.

Actually, if you just asked I would have been happy to point to the long-standing criticisms of Stevens and Young in conservative circles.

Other Side said...

I think the nomination of Palin was very smart. Fortunately, it won't matter.

If I had asked, then there would have been no reason for the post. Where's the fun in that?

Dad29 said...

How to Fix Your DVD (dad29 style.)

1) Unplug and remove DVD from other appliances. Holding the DVD, walk to the back door of your home.

2) Set DVD on its edge about 10 yards from your back door, making certain that the DVD's broad side is facing said door.

3) Retreat into your home. Gather your 12-ga shotgun and 1 round for same.

4) Go to rear doorway. Load shotgun, making certain to keep finger off the trigger.

5) Point shotgun directly at DVD. Steady yourself against the doorframe or other solid object. Breathe in, then release 1/2 the breath.

6) Place finger on trigger. SQUEEZE the trigger until hammer drops on shell, detonating gunpowder. FOLLOW THROUGH with trigger-squeeze.

7) Put the weapon down in a place where your wife and children cannot find it and use it on you.

8) Go to back yard with handy-dandy garbage bag. Place remnants of DVD in garbage bag. Feign complete ignorance when neighbor inquires about the loud noise.

9) Get in car. Go to Best Buy. Obtain new DVD legally.

10) Return to home and wire in the working DVD. Resume watching Brewers games.

Other Side said...

Seemed like too much work, and messy. I eventually just opened the contraption and removed the piece of lint that had gotten stuck in the drive. Works fine now.

Thanks for your thoughts, though.